The Flowerpot Men

When I was very small, I used to Watch with Mother, and the Flowerpot Men were my favourite. Two little men all made out of flowerpots, speaking an incomprehensible nonsense, and every week, one of them would do something slightly naughty, and we had to guess which one.

I wouldn't say that either Ieuan Wyn Jones or Nick Bourne really look the part of flowerpot men, although some people can probably quite easily imagine both of them saying 'bob-op-ti-pop' or 'slob-a-dob' quite happily. But it was the 'naughty' part that brought the image to mind.

For months before the election on May 3rd, Mr Bourne, aka Bill, repeatedly briefed the media that talks between the three parties were ongoing with regard to what might happen after the election. My sources in the Conservative Party tell me that Bill said as much internally as well.

However, my equally reliable sources inside Plaid have recently told me that Ieuan Wyn Jones, aka Ben, regularly re-assured the members of his party that there were no such discussions, formal, informal, direct or through intermediaries.

Now Ceredig is a fairly simple soul, but it seems to me that, logically, both of these statements cannot be correct. So, one of the flowerpot men must have been, shall we say, economical with the actualité. Given that it seems increasingly likely that one of them will be our First Minister, and the other his Deputy, it would be nice to know which one we should most be willing to trust. Boris Johnson would offer a coconut for the answer, but alas, I have none to give. But I'd still be interested if anyone could tell me, with hard evidence, the answer to the question with which all followers of Watch with Mother will be familiar – was it Bill, or was it Ben?